“Learning to put yourself first is neither selfishness nor pride. It's Self Love”.
Charles Chaplin
Looking after yourself is not an extravagance or whim, it is a necessity, therefore:
- Recognize your limits and set realistic goals - realize what you can and cannot do;
- Pay attention to the warning signs - it is natural to have a sense of occasional loss of control (eg yelling at the person in charge) because it is human and we all have limits. But if this situation starts to be frequent, it is a sign that you should seek help. Do not insist or be ashamed because this is the result of the situation you are experiencing;
- Look for information and advice on the disease, on how to provide care;
- Take time for yourself, treat yourself - Ex: make a list of things that give you pleasure and resume them regularly;
- Do not give too much importance to criticism - Ex: others only know one side of the story and are not subject to the same strain and pressure, so it is easy for them to speak;
- Don't isolate yourself and maintain your social contacts - Ex: leave home, change environments, contact people you haven't seen for some time, with the necessary precautions due to the current pandemic context and whenever possible. Socializing through video calls can help you to distract youself, talk about other matters and forget about your caregiver routine;
- Learn to deal with stress - identify and put into practice small techniques that relieve the tension caused by the situation of taking care of someone, whether if it is by taking a walk or calling a friend;
- Talk to other people who are or have been in a similar situation - With them you will be able to understand that you are not alone, learn new ways to deal with the situation and realize that “a divided problem is a half solved problem”;
- Don't neglect the rest of the family - the rest of the family needs you too and can give you the energy you need in some moments;
- Be available to accept help from others and the resources of your community - accept help from other family members, friends or neighbours, when they are available to stay with the person in your care, so that you can have some time available for yourself; Do not be afraid to use the services and responses of your community, such as: home support service or the hospitalization for the caregiver's rest.
